An Easter parable for David Cameron

The palace of the king

Once upon a time there was a powerful king who ruled a land filled with all kinds of people. Some of the people were concerned about the land and they had asked the previous king if things would get better for them all. They had also asked this old king what he had thought about God (because it was an important question for many of the people).

"We don't do God," said the old king, but he assured the people that he was one of 'them'.

Some of the other people then began to blame 'them' when the old king went off to march to war (or at least sent his people off to war (because his legs ached when he marched)). Some of 'them' were horrified that he had said he was one of 'them' and had then gone to war (because 'them there people' didn't like war on the whole).

The new king was only a little different (as kings often are). The new king presided over a court who believed that the people in his land would be a lot happier if they learned to stand on their own two feet and stop complaining about their lot. He believed that these people needed to quit complaining and get on with his Big Plan. Some of the people in the country were unhappy because they didn't have their basic needs, but the king was adamant that they had made the decision to be unhappy themselves and they needed to learn to take responsibility (because responsibility never belongs to kings) and to pull themselves up by their bootstrings and count their blessings (because he liked to point out people who were worse off. 'Let me take you by the hand and lead you through the streets of London...' he may have said (except he liked to keep himself to himself and not mix with the hoi polloi)). If only the people would support him and carry out his Big Plan then things could go on as usual and he could stay king, he thought.

When some of the people asked this new king what he thought about God, the king said, "We do do God and I am one of 'them' too." He went on to talk about how God was on his side in his Big Plan and that he was just carrying out God's own plan from way, way back, many centuries ago.

Again, some of the people were horrified that this new king had told all the people that he was one of 'them' because the other people always took this as a bad sign (that was partly because of the previous king and because it was simply not cool to be 'one of them'). Cool was always as cool looked, not as cool did. Kings were not cool and 'they' were not cool.

So the king waited for a huge festival that 'they' liked (just a little while before the people would decide if he could remain king). And then he said that the poor people in the land would have to work ever so much harder because they were not carrying out the Big Plan. And besides that, he said, God was with him so anyone who disagreed was really disagreeing against God. Well, he left that conclusion to their imaginations. He said that he hadn't said these words so that the people would keep him as their king... no, not at all, nosiree (after all there are those who say all kings are the same).

So the people, all kinds of people, waited and looked for some kind of hope for the future. But they feared that all kings really were the same. And when kings said they were one of 'them', it was the 'them' who got the blame (even though 'they' were not the enemy).

So all that could be hoped was that things would get better and the kings would have a change of heart. And if they really did do God and really did have a Big Plan for a 'broken land' (which may or may not have been misdiagnosed (but who can argue with God?)), then one day things would change for the better and they would not march off to war or make things worse in the land again.

But kings are kings.

Latest project - Leah and the Football Dragons

I've been collaborating on a new project to get this children's story published as an ebook. I designed the cover, formatted to book and wrote the blurb. Paul Mullins did the hard work and wrote the book! It is a fun story written from the heart:

Here is the blurb:

There are all kinds of dragons. There are successful dragons who always win and sit on their piles of gold. And then there are the Deadtail Dragons, a boys football team who know only of defeat. 

There is only one talented footballer who can change the fortunes of the Deadtail Dragons. And there is just one problem. That footballer is a girl. 

How can Leah win when her local football teams only accept boys? How can she succeed when they tell her that ‘Girls can’t play football’? 

Taking her own destiny in her hands Leah comes up with a bold plan to both fulfil her sporting dreams and help the Deadtail Dragons to fly. 

Written by football reporter Paul Mullins, Leah and the Football Dragons is a story for children aged 8 upwards.

A lot of the ebook was effectively crowdsourced - we let other people decide on the best cover and title.

So well done Paul on your first published tale.

If you get the time, check out the book on Amazon: Leah and the Football Dragons.

The Owl Flies At Night

An update for my long-suffering blog readers:

The winter hasn't been entirely spent in hibernation. The novel (which has a working title of 'Destiny and Dynasty') is progressing and should be published (one way or another) later in the year.

In the meantime I've written and published a short story called 'The Owl Flies At Night' as an ebook.

It's a short story which I've sat on for quite a few years. Originally it was going to be part of my novel, but it didn't fit and I thought it worked better as a standalone story. I've used a few writing tricks and experiments, there is an unreliable narrator and I've also experimented with frame stories. In the end it has turned into a story within a story within a story (and that is on-purpose). I had a lot of fun with this one and it was enjoyable to write but I suppose the test will be to find out what people think of it.

Here are the details and the blurb:

'Owl Flies at Night is a satirical short story about Dr Eric Swell and his adventures on the astral plane. As Dr Swell once said, 'It is your destiny to read this.' 

Dr Swell maintains that having an out of body experience is just like riding a magic carpet and that negative astral experiences don't exist. You can trust him can't you? Surely we can all trust him.

Just look over your shoulder now and sense your spirit guide nodding in approval as you read these very words. 

Learn the identity of Narcissus. Free yourself from dogma. Find a story within a story. Do not doubt Dr Swell. He is entirely reliable and his words are like a light at the end of all our tunnels. 

This is a sample of Dr Swell's best work, his magnum opus. It is a work which will herald a paradigm shift in the world's collective consciousness. 

We all have a destiny.'

I wanted to publish the story for free as an Amazon ebook, but the platform doesn't allow that so I have priced it at the lowest price. So I'll try to use as many free promotions as Amazon allow.

Please do check it out if you can. Here is the Amazon link.

Revival and revolution

I have a cold so this entry may lack research and statistics and quantitative data.

A few weeks back I wrote speculatively about the consequences of a revival in the country. Specifically I wrote about the impact on the jobs market. Very few people are talking about revival and the political and economic implications of it. That makes it even more important to talk about in the event that it ever takes place.

Historically there have been revivals which have influenced the UK. Many people believe that revivals are the soft version of revolutions, a kind of non-violent turning of the tables. There has been a lot which has been written about how revivals have prevented revolutions and as a result many people see revivals as a kind of soft compromise position. The truth of this is not known as there are very few people alive today who have seen a genuine, influential revival.

What we have, in the Christian community, is a very hazy vision of what a revival should look like. Choruses like 'Revival' by Robin Mark offer an idealistic interpretation:

"From the preacher 
preaching when the well is dry
To the lost soul 
reaching for a higher high 
From the young man 
working through his hopes and fears
To the widow 
walking through the veil of tears
Every man and woman 
every old and young
Every father’s daughter, 
every mother’s son."

Apart from the obvious fact that 'every old and young' is a lousy line, the general emphasis of the chorus is nicely idealistic and inclusive. If the Church were to offer an alternative political viewpoint in the face of Labour and Conservative consensus then that may not be such a bad thing (whether it is the Church's job to do that is another matter). But perhaps that is not such a strange idea.

There is little unity on the issue in Christian circles. Many believers take a more pessimistic view of the future and see no great revival which will make things better. They see things getting worse and a kind of 'remnant' being left who believe. This would seem to square nicely with some of the trends about those who no longer call themselves Christians (e.g. the census information). There are many others who are deeply cynical about the subject and conspiracy theories abound about 'Joel's Army' and Kundalini-influenced events. Others see the European Union as a kind of revived Roman empire which will quash all liberty in faith matters. Only the Christian imagination could come up with such a bold, persistent statement.

Historically the media has dealt with revivals in a haphazard way. The Welsh revival was covered by many newspapers and the reports were both positive or negative (depending on the opinion of the writer). In the film Elmer Gantry, the reporter Jim Lefferts remains cynical throughout (and in this case, rightly so). But the issue is still seen as newsworthy. It is not something that must be taboo because it deals with spirituality and God.

Thinking people can't look at the current floods in the UK and entirely sideline God when it comes to the blame game. Personally I think it is intellectually insulting to do so. It may be the fault of the jet stream, but many believe that God has allowed the jet stream to do the damage. Of course, if you don't believe in God you are spared from these kind of thoughts. Which is just as well because they are all pretty grim and entirely useless. Better to blame floods and man-flu on the Government as politicians are usually visible and pretend to be accountable. It may not be rational to do so, but it is satisfying.

But if a God can allow the floods to take place, why can't he allow a flood of love and mercy to fill the nation? If God is permissive, or neglectful enough to allow negative events to occur then why is the permissiveness always in disaster... or ridiculous man-flu?

I have a fairly hazy vision of what a revival should be myself and I imagine that should one occur in my lifetime it would not be as I expect. I can insist with God that it is a liberating revival and quote "Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom" until I sneeze over an invisible angel, but the fact is that there are a whole host of people who are not concerned with any kind of freedom. If a revival popped up in the future and it was a stifling, legislative nightmare then all that would be left for me and my belief system would be to be a little saddened by God.

There are some days when I really think there should be a revolution. Maybe that would make things better. Maybe a revolution would turn the tables and bring peace and freedom. But a revival would be more long lasting. And a revival would make things better for most people. Whether this is a soft-compromise solution, I will leave to your judgement.

Lost diaries

I learned from a fairly young age that I have to be careful about what I write. It wasn't even the journalism training which taught me this - I learned it way before then, back at school.

When I was 16 I decided to start to write my first diary. It seemed like a good idea at the time - I would be able to express my most intimate thoughts and I would be able to record all of life's injustices (because there are a lot more injustices when you are young).

At the time I was a bit envious of my best friend because he was better looking than me and got more attention from girls. So I wrote about this in my diary, writing the person's name (see how I still have to be careful?) and then writing... " my best friend…and not." I had written some negative things about teachers and other people at school too. But it was this expression of envy towards my best friend that would cause the trouble.

Writers live or die over and over by the sword. I made the mistake of taking my diary to school in my bag one day. On that day I left my bag unattended for a while. A couple of friends (including my best friend) decided that it would be funny to look in my bag while I wasn't around. When I returned I didn't know they had read the diary.

The next day, a poster was put on a wall in school with all the names of people who were in line to be voted as possible school reps. My name was there and someone had written in ink next to my name " – best friend…and not.’

It was one of those horrible heart-stopping moments in which you can hear the blood pumping to your brain. I knew what had happened straight away and I was very embarrassed. It took a long time and an apology from me for my friend to forgive me. Other people just looked at me with disapproval for a while.

This was all long before Facebook or Twitter or blogs were around. The world has changed and there are a lot more opportunities for people to offend others (often in public). There are a lot of pressures in the writing world. Bloggers will often say: "I write what I want," but the truth is that most of us are desperately trying not to alienate one person or the other. And the laws of libel and defamation still apply - so whether there is the illusion of freedom of expression or not, the truth is that there are constraints on what most people can say. Some people, obviously, just don't care what others think. But that doesn't mean that they are writing with freedom. Writing freely is partly about being able to write what you want to write - but if what you are writing is always ugly, if it is always negative then where is the real freedom? That freedom should include being able to write beauty.

I suppose writers want to discover a freedom in writing. I know that I do. A feeling that you can say some things without other people immediately taking offence or people looking at you with disapproval.

And it is still true that the first writing commandment should be followed: "Thou shalt not be a pretentious arse".

I don't know what happened to that old diary. It is a shame because I managed to document a lot of life's injustices in it. And it was powerful stuff - even life would have blushed. Maybe life felt that the things I had on it were too dangerous to be in the world and organised a miraculous spontaneous combustion of the diary pages. Or maybe it just wanted to teach me a lesson.

Merry Christmas

Hope you have a great Christmas and New Year. If all else fails go into survival mode...

What Rocks Your World trailer

This is the video I created for What Rocks Your World.